


you're my glue

by resonae



Series: glue me back together [2]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Past Sexual Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-10
Updated: 2013-09-10
Packaged: 2017-12-26 04:29:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/961575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/resonae/pseuds/resonae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raleigh's determined to put Chuck back together, no matter how long it might take. H/C sex.</p><p>Part of my glue!verse, but can be read separately since the first part is kind of dark.</p>
            </blockquote>





	you're my glue

**Author's Note:**

> The events in the first part are mentioned, which was incest, underage rape between Scott and Chuck. It's not specifically said, I don't think, but still, trigger warning.

The world goes on, Raleigh realizes. It feels weird seeing Chuck interact with people, people who don’t know what happened, and it feels even weirder to realize that he was one of those people three days ago.

 

“I know what you’re thinking,” Herc tells him right before a press conference they all have to attend. Herc looks different, in a suit. “How can the world go on like this?” He stares at the stage, where thousands of reporters are waiting for them. “How can people laugh so carelessly, be so happy, when Chuck’s torn up inside?” Raleigh swallows thickly. Herc looks defeated, and it’s a look that’s becoming familiar. But Chuck steps in, fumbling with his tie, and Herc rolls his eyes. “Little bugger still can’t do his tie.”

 

“Sod off, old man.” Chuck grumbles, and he moves to shove the tie in Herc’s direction. Herc neatly redirects him toward Raleigh, and Chuck blinks. “What?”

 

“Got a boyfriend to do it for you now, don’t you?” Herc snorts. “I’m gonna go see what the delay is.”

 

Raleigh chuckles and eases the tie from Chuck’s hand, loops it around his neck, and Chuck flinches. Raleigh realizes what he’s doing. “Chuck,” he says, his voice firm. “It’s me.” Chuck blinks, once, twice, before he sighs and he reaches up to hold Raleigh’s wrists. Raleigh lets him ground himself, not breaking eye contact until Chuck leans forward to rest his forehead on Raleigh’s shoulder. “You okay?”

 

Chuck nods against his shoulder. “..Yeah.”

 

“You’re gonna have to let me actually see the tie for me to tie it.” Raleigh smiles when Chuck lifts his head again, sticking his tongue out. He ties the knot quickly, keeping the tie loose around Chuck’s neck instead of pulling it snug like he usually would. Just in case, he asks again, “You okay?”

 

Chuck nods, then winces. “I’m.. sorry.” When Raleigh raises and eyebrow, Chuck makes a general motion with his hands. “You know. For being a live minefield. Having triggers everywhere. Like a fucking tie.”

 

Raleigh grips his hand and leans over to kiss Chuck’s nose. “Don’t be sorry. I told you. You’re perfect.” _Plus, it’s not your fault_ , Raleigh adds silently, gripping Chuck’s hand tighter. Now that he knows what’s going on, he wants to rip Scott Hansen to shreds, if Herc hasn’t done it already. Chuck has trained himself not to make his reactions visible to the unknowing passerby, but Raleigh sees every flinch, every hesitation.

 

And it’s only been three days. He doesn’t know how Chuck’s done it his entire life. “You two look dashing,” Mako says, sweeping in with her dress. It’s _weird_ to se Mako in a dress, even though she looks stunning in it, and it’s not even a formal dress, just a one-piece that one of her fans sent her. (She’s probably going to give said fan a heart attack when she steps out into the cameras with the dress on.)

 

“Thanks,” Chuck grins at Mako. “You look pretty good, too.”

 

“Ready?” Mako asks, offering Raleigh her hand. Raleigh squeezes Chuck’s hand before he lets go to take Mako’s. Chuck quirks a smile at Raleigh before shuffling up to Herc. Raleigh glances to see Herc squeeze Chuck’s hand, and the simple gesture makes Chuck’s stiff shoulders relax. “He is Chuck’s father, Raleigh,” Mako laughs quietly beside him. “No need to get jealous.”

 

\--

 

They answer a bunch of questions they’ve answered a million times already. Raleigh can see Chuck’s getting twitchy, not the scared-twitchy, but the bored-to-death-twitchy. Herc keeps throwing him a warning look, which makes Chuck still for about thirty seconds before he’s back to tapping the table impatiently with his fingers. “Mister Becket, Miss Mori, will you two address the rumors that you two are dating?”

 

Chuck stops tapping the table, but when Raleigh glances, he looks amused, not annoyed. More like _good-luck-with-that-mate_. Mako speaks up first, fighting to keep the exasperation from her voice. “For the millionth time, Raleigh and I are not in a romantic relationship. We just do not see each other that way.”

 

“But you two are co-pilots, correct?”

 

Raleigh speaks up. “You trying to imply there’s something going on with the Hansens, too, then?” He squeezes Chuck’s hand under the table, in case that’s a no-zone, but Chuck only snorts and squeezes his hand back. There’s a muttered laughter in the crowd. “You don’t have to be romantically involved to be co-pilots. I mean, I wasn’t doing anything fishy with my brother.”

 

“But back then, you were family. A lot of fans seem to-“

 

“Hey.” Chuck speaks up, swirling the water in the glass. “Raleigh and I are dating, all right? So he’s not dating Mako.”

 

There’s silence in the room. Absolute silence. Mako looks like she’s attempting to hold back laughter, and Herc looks resigned, but the corner of Chuck’s lips are drawn in the trademark Chuck-smirk. So Raleigh ends their press conference by pressing a gentle hand on Chuck’s neck until they’re face to face, and then kissing him.

 

\--

 

Tendo claps Chuck’s back. “Congratulations, kiddo.” He snickers. “You’ve single-handedly managed to flood Herc with work.”

 

“Raleigh kissed me.” Chuck points out.

“You regretting it?” Raleigh raises an eyebrow. Herc (since he doesn’t do punishments for Chuck) has assigned him to all the paperwork that came along with their worldwide-broadcast kiss. Meaning Raleigh has to sort through the literal ton of mail that comes in every day. They get all sorts of fanmail and hatemail pouring to the Hong Kong Shatterdome, and Raleigh is careful to make sure Chuck never gets hold of the big packages. Chuck laughs at the hatemail, but Raleigh’s never going to let him get dead animals, food with nails baked into it, or drinks filled with nail polish.

 

Chuck gets a huge grin as he picks up a pink letter with hearts written all over it. Most letters are kindly supportive, and as much as there are severely hateful ones, there a few on the opposite side of the spectrum that Tendo calls ‘hardcore fangirls’. Raleigh appreciates them, really, makes him smile especially after he’s opened a box to find dead rats, but he likes them mostly because they make Chuck smile.

 

“I hear you’re getting requests to come onto TV shows.” Tendo grins.

 

“Yeah.” Raleigh admits. “But I’m not too keen on going on those.” Chuck nods in agreement, wincing at the thought of it. “God, that’d be awkward.” He tosses another love-stricken letter at Chuck, who reads over it with a dimply grin.

 

Raleigh really fucking loves that smile.

 

\--

 

Chuck’s birthday is creeping up. Raleigh doesn’t know what to do with it. When he consulted Tendo, Tendo said _ignore it, they’ve always skipped it_ , but Raleigh doesn’t want to ignore it. He doesn’t want to let the wound fester. He wants to heal it.

 

On August 14th, Raleigh gets a cake, but declines the candles. He doesn’t want to push Chuck that far yet. He shudders in anger but stomps the anger down. Scott Hansen doesn’t have a place today. “Do you trust me?” He asks that night, when Chuck’s surfing around the internet on Raleigh’s laptop.

 

Chuck glances over. “…Why?” When Raleigh shrugs, Chuck shuts his laptop. “Yeah. You know that, already.”

 

The clock hits midnight, and Raleigh grips Chuck’s hands. “Chuck.” He says. “Happy 22nd birthday.” Chuck doesn’t say anything. “I got you cake,” Raleigh offers, but doesn’t move from holding Chuck’s hands.

 

Chuck breaks the tense silence with a defeated chuckle. “You and your cake fetish,” he says, falling into Raleigh’s chest with a soft _thump_. Raleigh shuffles over with his arm full of Chuck to get cake, but Chuck stops him. “Leave the cake in there. Let’s have it tomorrow morning.”

 

Raleigh doesn’t argue. This is for Chuck, after all. “You tired?” Chuck doesn’t usually sleep at midnight, usually stays up until 1 or 2, at least, but still.

 

“No, just…” Chuck bites his lip. “It’s… my birthday.” Raleigh nods, his pulse jumping in excitement. “I can do whatever I want, right?”

 

Raleigh laughs, half relieved, half elated. “Well, not _whatever_ you want, but I’m willing to push all boundaries for you today.”

 

Chuck smiles, a little hesitant, and then goes, “Well, uh. Can we, you know.” He blushes up to the roots of his ginger hair. “Sleep together.”

 

Raleigh wants to point out _we already sleep together_ until it clicks in his head. _Oh_.

 

\--

 

After he’s done staring like an idiot, he fumbles with everything and looks more like an idiot. “I haven’t got condoms.” He says, rummaging through his drawer like a dog digging for a bone. “I’ve got…. Hand lotion? We can use that as lube.”

 

“Why do you have lotion?” Chuck blinks, looking a little too amused. That’s good, Raleigh thinks. Not that looking like an idiot before sex is a good thing, but he’ll take a smiling Chuck over a nervous, frightened Chuck any day.

 

He probably could think of more romantic conversation, but since they’re both guys, he goes with, “You don’t use it to jack off?”

 

Chuck flushes a bright red and goes _oh_. “I… I mean. No. I kind of stayed away from anything sexual after him. I mean I.. did, but not with lotion, and..” He trails off, looking embarrassed, and says instead, “On that note, he never used condoms, either. But, uh, I’m clean. I got a checkup when I was in the hospital, afterward. And I haven’t done anything with anyone, so…”

 

Chuck’s rambling, wringing his hands nervously, and so Raleigh takes the hands and kisses each knuckle. “Stop thinking about him. Look at me, and focus on me.” Chuck’s eyes slide up to lock with his, and Raleigh grins. “Trust me.”

 

Chuck mirrors his grin. “I do,” is all he says, and it means really everything. Raleigh shuts off the lights and he lets Chuck breathe deeply before he joins him in bed. Raleigh shoves his own clothes off first, lets Chuck smooth his breath out again, and kisses each cheekbone.

 

“This stops whenever you say stop,” he reminds Chuck, slowly pushing Chuck’s shirt up to reveal chiseled abs. He doesn’t know if he should take the shirt off completely. “Do you want it off, or..” He slides his hands under the shirt to gently rub his fingers on Chuck’s shoulders, feeling out each burn scar under the pads of his fingers.

 

“On? For now.” Chuck says, his voice shaking a little. “My jeans can go off, though.” Raleigh lets the shirt fall back down, and unclasps Chuck’s belt, and slides his jeans off slowly, just in case Chuck changes his mind. But Chuck says nothing as Raleigh tugs them off his feet along with his socks, and returns to rub at the waistband of his boxers. Chuck nods, shortly, and Raleigh pulls them down, again, slowly.

 

“I wish I could turn the lights on.” Raleigh breathes, rubbing Chuck’s thighs and feeling out the scar on the inside of one of them.

 

Chuck pauses, and Raleigh can tell he’s thinking about it, but he says, “Not today, please?”

 

Raleigh smiles as he presses kisses onto Chuck’s neck. “Not today. Only when you want.” He wishes he could see Chuck, with only a thin cotton shirt as a barrier between them, but he’s not going to push anything. “Remember, stop me when you want. Anytime you want. If you need something, tell me.” It’s only been a little over a week since Chuck had panicked during their first time. “What made you ready for this?”

 

Chuck hesitates, but when he smiles, Raleigh’s glad his eyes have adjusted to the dark and he can see it. “I mean. I know what you’ve been doing, with the packages. You know. The dead animals, or whatever. I just… it just hit me today, I guess. That I can trust you.”

 

Raleigh says nothing, just presses kisses down Chuck’s neck and slides between Chuck’s thighs, pressing close. He’s careful with everything he does, but when Raleigh moves his hands down to stroke Chuck’s cock, Chuck doesn’t panic – he just grabs at Raleigh and gasps. They don’t say much after that, and Chuck takes Raleigh’s own cock into his hands. Chuck’s clumsy, and his hands stutter, so Raleigh laughs, not unkindly, and takes both of them into his hands. “This okay?” Chuck nods, groaning under him and bucking his hips upward.

 

Raleigh strokes Chuck through his orgasm, carefully watching to see telltale signs of his PTSD coming back. But Chuck only lets out a throaty moan and buries his head in Raleigh’s collar, panting hard. “You good?”

 

“Yeah. More than.” Chuck answers, his hands twitching on Raleigh’s chest. “You… it didn’t feel good for you?”

 

Raleigh grins. “It did.” He kisses Chuck’s ear. “I just… took too much trying to make sure you were okay.” He admits, and he tugs Chuck’s hands to his cock. “You wanna help me?” Chuck grins back at him, unabashed. He’s not hesitant taking Raleigh into his hands, but he strokes hesitantly, and so Raleigh gently puts his hands over Chuck’s guiding him through it. “A little tighter. There you go.” He’s breathing hard against Chuck’s ear, and he groans a little as he finishes into Chuck’s grip. Chuck brings his hand to his face and licks a long stripe from the bottom of his palm to the tips of his fingers, his eyes dead set on Raleigh.

 

Raleigh makes a strangled noise in his throat. Chuck eyes him, his eyebrow raised. “You didn’t like that? He’d, you know, make me do it, and it seemed to get him off, so I thought-“

 

Raleigh stops him with a kiss. “Chuck. This is the man who raped you. What makes you think we’re going to be the same?” Chuck’s face twists, and Raleigh slides his hands under Chuck’s shirt, rubbing his thumb over the scars again. Chuck flinches, and Raleigh slides his other arm around Chuck to pull him close. “Listen, Chuck. You don’t have to do things for me because you think I’ll like it. If I’m being completely honest, that was the hottest thing I’ve seen in my life. But I don’t want you to revisit your bad memories just for me. Sex is a two-way street, yeah, but for now I’d like to be me doing everything I can for you. Until you’re good with everything. And _then_ , we’ll visit my kinks.”

 

Chuck laughs, shakily, and then genuinely, punching his shoulder. “You’re so good to me.”

 

“I know.” Raleigh laughs, grinning broadly. “It’s because I love you.”

 

Chuck smiles back at him. “Yeah. Me too.”

 

Raleigh takes the lotion after that, fishing Chuck a tissue to wipe his hands with, and draws Chuck’s legs up. “Remember.”

 

“Tell you to stop. I know.” Chuck says, easily drawing his legs up and bending them at the knee to spread them wider. “I’m fine. In all seriousness, Becket, get on with it.” Raleigh smiles at the cheeky smirk Chuck throws him, and still he presses a kiss onto Chuck’s nose as he eases a finger inside. Chuck pauses, as if to adjust, and wriggles down. “Feels weird.”

 

“Like a bad weird or a..”

 

“No. Just weird.”

 

Raleigh kisses Chuck’s nose again as he prods into a different angle every time he slowly moves his finger inside, and he grins when Chuck’s body tightens and Chuck lets out a surprised yelp. “Feel good?”

 

“What the fuck was that?” Chuck demands, and then, “Do it again.”

 

“Prostate gland.” Raleigh smiles, crooking his finger again. Chuck reaches up to grip at his shoulder. Raleigh starts massaging the bundle of nerves, and Chuck writhes under him, gasping. “Think you can take in one more?” Chuck nods, and Raleigh slips in the second finger. It doesn’t seem to bother Chuck too much, so he scissors lightly, keeping one finger firmly on the gland and prepping Chuck with the other. He doesn’t want Chuck to come just yet, so he pulls his fingers out and lets Chuck breathe through the waves. “You good?”

 

“Fuck.” Chuck replies, and Raleigh grins. “Are you going to-“

 

“No, one more.” Raleigh kisses the inside of Chuck’s thigh, bending low to press light kisses on the scar. _You’re not broken_ , Raleigh wants to tell Chuck, but doesn’t. “Ready?” Chuck nods, so Raleigh slowly pushes a third finger in. Chuck shifts, and shivers a little. “Not good?”

“No, no, I’m fine. Just… It just feels weird. Maybe a little bad weird.” Raleigh’s already pulling his fingers back out, but Chuck grabs his wrist and pushes himself back on Raleigh’s fingers. Raleigh would’ve found it incredibly hot, if he weren’t worried for Chuck. “I’m okay. Just let me get used to it, yeah? Can you… talk to me?”

 

Raleigh realizes Chuck’s eyes are shut, and bends over to whisper into Chuck’s ear. “You’re so good, you know that? So good to me. I love you so much, I don’t even know how to put it into words. You’re so amazing, so perfect.“ He mouths Chuck’s shoulders through the shirt, kissing every burn scar he can feel through the fabric. “You’re perfect.”

 

Chuck sighs, his body falling relaxed around Raleigh’s fingers, so Raleigh presses a knuckle into the prostate gland, and Chuck groans. “I’m good.” He whispers, and Raleigh grinds his finger to the spot again. “Yeah, definitely good.” There’s a smile, and Raleigh carefully scissors in and out, rotating his wrists to make Chuck gasp.

 

“You think you can.. you think you’re ready?” Raleigh whispers, pressing a kiss to Chuck’s knee, and Chuck wraps his ankles around Raleigh’s back in response. Raleigh squeezes the lotion onto his hands, rubbing a gracious amount on himself, and then squeezes more onto Chuck. He places butterfly kisses onto Chuck’s shoulders, half wishing he could push the shirt up. But he doesn’t want to push Chuck too far.

 

He lines himself up and pushes inside slowly. Chuck hasn’t had sex of any sort in the past six, seven years of his life, and Raleigh gasps, his breath hitching as heat takes him over. He trembles with exertion, then leans forward to push in deeper, but Chuck lets out a broken sob and he freezes. “No, stop. _Please_.” He whimpers, and Raleigh pulls back out, thumbing Chuck’s tightly squeezed eyes and kissing away the tears.

 

“Chuck.” Raleigh says, pulling Chuck’s legs down. “It’s me. Come on, baby, open your eyes. It’s me.” He presses his lips to Chuck’s temple, thumbing away tears. “It’s just me.”

 

Chuck gasps like a man coming out of water, and his hands clutch at Raleigh. “ _Fuck_ ,” he says, his shoulders shaking as he turns to face Raleigh. “I’m okay.” He says, rubbing angrily at his eyes. “Fuck, I’m such a fucking mess.”

 

Chuck rises and turns away from Raleigh to bury his face in his hands, and Raleigh sits up to rub his shoulders. Chuck shrugs him away and he doesn’t push. “It’s okay, Chuck.” He says, as softly as possible.

 

“No, it’s not.” Chuck says, angrily. “ _Fuck_.”

 

It’s not, he’s right, but Raleigh doesn’t know what to say. He instead pulls Chuck’s hand into his, and watches the tremor alleviate. “How come this helps you so much?” He wonders.

 

“My old man.” Chuck says, smiling sadly. “He never let go of my hand when I was recovering. Stayed by myself, the entire time, never took his hand off even when we were sleeping. It helped. A lot. Psychological thing, I guess. Just give me a bit, and I’ll be okay.”

 

Raleigh frowns. “Are you sure? I don’t want to push you.”

 

Chuck turns to fall back onto the bed. “Raleigh, I’m a guy, too. Ever since a week ago, I’ve been thinking about this.” He waves between them. “And I’m sick of running away because I can’t stand it. I’m sick of being scared, of having triggers everywhere. I’m tired.”

 

Raleigh rubs his thumb over Chuck’s hands. “I want to help you.”

 

“I know.” Chuck grins, and then reaches over to tug Raleigh between his legs, letting his legs fall around Raleigh. “Just talk to me, so I know it’s you.”

 

Raleigh presses his lips to Chuck’s nose, and reaches for the lotion again. He rubs between Chuck’s legs again, still slippery from before, but squeezes more onto his own cock. “Let me just check.” Raleigh says, rubbing lotion onto his fingers and sinking two in. Chuck is still open from the preparation from before, and Raleigh rubs the head of his cock onto Chuck. “Ready?”

 

“Yeah, just… keep talking.”

 

Raleigh nods. “I know. You’re good, Chuck, you’re good.” He holds himself steady, one hand on himself and one hand on Chuck’s hips as he pushes inside. “Tell me if it hurts, at all, all right? Tell me if you need me to stop.” Chuck nods, eyes squeezed shut. “Open your eyes, Chuck. Let me see you.” Chuck whimpers and shakes his head, so Raleigh kisses his closed eyelids. “All right, that’s okay.” Chuck’s hands are gripping his arms, and Raleigh’s fairly sure he’s going to have bruises on there, but he pushes in slowly, whispering sweet nothings in Chuck’s ear until he’s completely bottomed out. “You feel so good.” Raleigh breathes, unsure if he can keep talking. “God, you feel so good.”

 

Chuck lets out a shaky laugh, tilts his hips a bit, and sighs. His eyes flutter open, their eyes lock, and Chuck grins. “You feel good, too.” Raleigh laughs and licks into Chuck’s mouth, pushing his tongue between Chuck’s teeth.

 

“Can I move, or do you need…”

 

“No, just… move. Now?” Chuck grins, and when Raleigh pulls out slowly, Chuck’s eyelids slide and Raleigh shifts up so Chuck can rest his forehead on Raleigh’s. “Can we just… stay quiet?” Chuck asks, and Raleigh nods, keeping his pace slow until Chuck growls for more, tugging Raleigh closer with his legs. Raleigh speeds up, still controlling his pace. Chuck’s squeezing tightly down onto him, panting into the older’s chest. Raleigh feels orgasm building low in his stomach and he’s about to reach between them to stroke Chuck to completion first, but Chuck cries out, squeezes Raleigh’s arms tight (Raleigh’s _definitely_ going to have bruises there tomorrow), and Raleigh manages to catch the liquid before it soils either of them too much.

 

Chuck shivers. “Sorry.” He whispers. “I – did you want to finish first, or… I’m just – he just trained me to-”

 

“Shh.” Raleigh says, swallowing Chuck’s lips. “Shh.” He snaps his hips a little more desperately, and he sucks a bruise into Chuck’s neck as he pulls out at the last moment, trying to make sure to not get too much on Chuck.

 

Chuck reaches downward. “Can I..”

 

“Yeah, anything you want.” Chuck’s fingers hesitantly brush over Raleigh’s cock as Raleigh plucks a tissue from the table to wipe his hands clean. Raleigh’s pretty tender from two orgasms, and he’s confused when Chuck tries to slide down. “What are you doing?”

 

“I want to blow you.”

 

That makes Raleigh flinch. He catches Chuck’s shoulders and pulls him back up. “Chuck, no.”

 

Chuck is adamant, and he reminds Raleigh. “You said anything.”

 

Raleigh shakes his head. “I thought you were going to give me a hand job or something. I’m not saying I don’t want a blowjob from you. That sounds incredibly hot. But I was just inside you. That’s not strictly sanitary.” He grins when Chuck scrunches his nose. “I want to shower.”

 

“My legs aren’t working.”

 

“Neither are mine.”

 

“Well, _that’s_ going to be difficult.” Chuck snorts, and he burrows into Raleigh’s arms. “You’ve wiped us down, right?”

 

“We’re going to feel disgusting in the morning.”

 

Chuck bites Raleigh’s collarbone in reply. “Tomorrow is another day. Right now, this is all I want.” 


End file.
